Love and Happiness

I think that everyone has their own belief system regarding the meaning of life. For me personally, the meaning of life is happiness. Happiness, after all, is a state of mind and since it is so subjective it has a great and varied meaning to many different people. I think that everyone whether they realize it or not is in the pursuit of happiness.

If the right hand is happiness then the left hand is love. Love is the Great Equalizer. No matter what bad, negative, or nasty thing happens in your life, if you have love, it too shall come to pass. I honestly believe that everyone wants to be loved and I also think that everyone needs to be loved. There would be a lot less grief in this world if everyone would just have compassion for their fellow human being.

For some people love and happiness is very elusive and the reason for that is because they don’t have the correct mindset. You must first be able to think and feel love and happiness, love yourself, and when you truly learn to do that you will see more love around you. There are some things you can do to help you achieve that state of mind. It has been my observation that truly happy people seem to have an idea or purpose for their life. It has also been my observation that truly happy people indulge totally in what they are passionate about. Some are professional in their passion and others are hobbyists and enthusiasts.

I’ve also come to realize that most happy people are also giving people, not only of their money, but of their time as well. Now if you think about that for a moment it makes perfect sense. Remember the last time you gave something to someone and you knew it would just blow them away? Or, you gave up some of your time to help someone else, maybe in need? Remember how that made you feel, the excitement and anticipation? Now imagine doing that on a much grander scale. See what I’m talking about now? What a tremendous feeling that is.

Another thing I noticed about happy people is that they are generally optimistic. They are always ready to have a good time, lighten up, and laugh a lot. You know what the old ‘digest’ says about laughter? Well, it’s true, your body and mind will benefit from it in a great way. A good hearty laugh, like exercise, great sex, and excellent food, releases those feel good hormones called endorphins. Endorphins are a production of the pituitary and hypothalamus glands and your brain releases this hormone when you experience happiness. The more you can experience endorphins the happier you will be. Happy people always count their blessings no matter how many they may or may not have. If you are a truly happy person you can look around you at any given moment in time and you will find something to be grateful for and give thanks.

Now I don’t want to make this sound like, “hey man, that’s all I got to do, and I’ll be happy?” No, of course not, and everyday life is not a bowl of cherries. Sure, you know there will be times when things don’t seem to be going right. That’s okay, deal with it, try to keep a positive and optimistic mindset, they’re just bumps in the road, and nothing last forever. The bottom line is you have to have faith. You must have faith in yourself and faith in your higher being.

Please don’t misunderstand me on this I would never try to convince you of something that you don’t feel comfortable with. Because you may or may not have your spiritual philosophy and belief system in place, and whether you do or do not, it is not my design to change that. If you feel you need to change your spiritual and religious views then that is entirely up to you. That’s not what this is about, it has nothing to do with religion, but I have found that happy people are very spiritual. There is a difference between being religious and being spiritual but that’s a topic for another time.

I mentioned earlier that happiness is a state of mind, and while that is true, in order for this state of happiness to be most effective you must include your body and your spirit. This is the complete trinity, and for me, compliments the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost. Here are some ideas and actions for you to consider in your quest for love and happiness.

1. Whenever you are confronted with negativity, and it cannot be avoided, try to search for anything positive in the experience, and try to focus on that. I know it’s easier said than done but the more skilled you are at this the easier it will become over time. It is very difficult to focus on the positive and optimistic if you are not feeling well.

2. It is absolutely essential that you eat right, exercise regularly, and sleep well if you are to be truly happy.

3. Try not to worry and definitely do not obsess over anything. It only causes stress you don’t need. It does no good to worry about things that you have no control over. There is a great deal of wisdom in the expression, “don’t sweat the small stuff.”

4. Hopefully I don’t have to tell you to be grateful for what you have. Everyone has someone or something in their life to be thankful for and being grateful is absolutely fundamental in achieving love and happiness.

5. It is really important that you pay attention and be careful with your self talk. For some reason when you are having a negative or bad experience, and especially if you feel you are at fault, you talk down on yourself. The worst part of this is that it seems natural to put yourself down. You say things to yourself like, “I can’t believe you did that, you’re so stupid!” Well, you can knock that off right now, there is absolutely no benefit to you, or anyone else for that matter, and if fact if you keep it up, you will give yourself an inferiority complex. So cut it out and say things to yourself that you like to hear and make you feel good.

6. Pay attention to your thought processes. Sometimes you’ll be having a negative, bad, or evil thought and at first you won’t consciously be aware you are having these types of thoughts and turning positive energy into negative energy. Those types of thought processes will create barriers for you to overcome on your path to seeking love and happiness. To help you with this concept, try to create a mental word or phrase, a trigger so to speak, so that when a negative thought pops into your head, you can say this mental trigger over and over until the bad thought is gone. I am actually getting pretty good at this. I learned an ancient Hawaiian healing technique called Ho’Oponopono from Dr. Joe “Mr. Fire” Vitale and Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len. Whenever a thought I don’t want enters my mind, I repeat this healing mantra over and over; “I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you,” until it goes away. I don’t experience many of those kinds of thought like I use to.

7. Get physical, yes I mean exercise, but I also mean physical contact with those you love and care about. Hugging, stroking a child’s hair or head, patting your pet on the head are just a few things you can do to put an instant smile of love and happiness on your face. I absolutely feel the love each and every time my granddaughters give me a kiss and a hug.

8. Give either your time or money or both if you can and help someone out that really needs it. You’re not just giving your time and money you are giving love and maybe some degree of happiness to someone who could really use it.

9. Be forgiving. Do your best to forgive others and yourself because you don’t need the access baggage of guilt and other negative emotions strapped across your back mentally. Learn to let it all go and you will feel free. You will never achieve the true Zen of happiness until you learn to forgive.

You are the sum total of all your life experiences and you didn’t get to where you are or who you are today, overnight. It has taken all your experiences and your years for you to arrive at this point in your life. Once you realize this, then you know you can change your thought processes leading to a more loving and happier life.

I have been reading quite a bit lately about the Law of Attraction and I think that what I have talked about here applies to that law as well. The Law of Attraction basically says that the things we focus our attention on we attract more of into our life. In another words, “thoughts become things,” is the philosophy of the Law of Attraction. The Zen philosophy here is having positive thoughts will create more positive energy and more positive energy will generate more love and happiness.

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